First Public Speech

Few people understand the analysis that goes into preparing your four-year old for his first public speech.  I'm convinced that parents put presidential speech writers to shame.  Having learned during his last birthday that if we build up our son's participation in something then he becomes painfully shy.  For example, when his birthday was coming up we kept reminding him that the Primary children at church were going to sing to him--he missed his friends from our last home and didn't always want to go to Primary.  Instead of getting him excited to be there, he began to scream uncontrollably for everyone to stop singing and we had to take him out into the hallway.  He wouldn't go back in until we promised him they wouldn't sing to him anymore.  Similarly, we built up meeting Santa at a Christmas party so much that when he was next in line to sit on his lap he did the same thing, and yelled at the Bishop's wife for encouraging him forward (though he apologized after calming down).  When he was assigned to speak in Primary, we knew right away that the best thing to do would be to treat it like no big deal.  Our strategy seemed to work pretty well throughout the week.  We'd ask him questions about the topic and mention the talk, then write down his answers and say nothing more.  We compiled his answers into a talk and practiced a couple of times on Saturday, with pictures and me standing next to him whispering the words to him.  Then, when my wife came home from the store, we did a practice run in front of an audience.  The big day finally came, and our son repeated throughout the morning, "I don't want to talk in church!"  I thought our plans were foiled.  I was tempted to resort to bribery or worse.  By worse, I mean something along the lines of what I read in an article about how Chinese moms are superior.  The woman wrote about the extreme pressure she put on her kids.  Her philosophy is that it is important to override a child's wants and make them do things that are difficult because (1) nothing is fun until one is good at it, (2) the only way to become good at something is to work at it, and (3) children gain confidence when they see what they've accomplished.  She believes that Western parents are too happy with mediocrity and show a lack of faith in their kids by giving up too easily, and that the Chinese style of teaching shows greater confidence in a child's abilities because you don't give up, you persist until they do it then you celebrate.  Eventually we agreed that we would get up together while I gave the talk.  Little did he know I was planning on purposefully getting things wrong, knowing he would correct me and thus be giving part of his talk.  My plan was obviously neither Western or Eastern.  It was probably from another planet where parents encourage their kids through passive-aggressive behavior.  Luckily, I didn't have to take any of those tactics.  When the general meeting ended, our son asked, "what about my talk?"  I realized he was only afraid of talking in front of the whole congregation, not the Primary.  When we got to Primary, he went right up to his seat on the stand.  When it was his turn to give his talk, he did it perfectly.  My wife and I were so proud.  I guess we should have been more clear about where he was giving his talk.  Then again, it may be a good tactic to keep in mind for the future--i.e. under-promise and over-deliver--I mean it worked with my wife and kids in law school.  Does this much thought go into presidential speeches?