"Please Pass the Parents."

Nothing makes you miss your kids as much as feeling that you were mean to them the night before and left for work before being able to make it up to them. It is especially true if the child you were mean to was the middle child. (It is also especially true when you go from work to the car mechanic expecting to wait an hour and pay $100, but end up leaving after waiting 3 hours, missing dinner in the process, and spending $1,000. But that is a story for another day.) My precious toddler is so beautiful, smart, and sweet, but she can also be ferocious and unyielding. Despite my best efforts, some days I get angry. Last night I put her to bed early and without books (I actually read her one book because I felt bad for being mean). But in my anger I held her ears open and spoke firmly into them, "You need to listen." It made her cry. It broke my heart. Then my wife, who is always the insightful one, told me that we do give a lot of attention to our oldest and our baby, sometimes ignoring our toddler. That added to my guilt. I knew it was true. I fell asleep thinking about her, and shortly after arriving to work, my wife called and handed the phone to our toddler. I think she knew how guilty I was feeling. We chatted for a minute then hung up. Then, after returning from the car shop, I came home and went straight to my little toddler, who had forgotten all about last night's episode, and hugged her and kissed her. She pushed me away, which meant she was just fine. Having three kids is hard. We almost have to rotate the amount of time and attention we give to each one. As soon as one feels loved, another feels neglected. I kind of imagine the kids sitting at the table and placing their parents on a lazy Susan set right in the middle. Then when one child is done, another might ask, "Please pass the parents," and rotate us right around the three of them. Then we wouldn't have to guess so much. Either way, no matter how tough it is, making it up to them is always a sweet experience.