The Exceptional

It's strange to realize how hard it is for me to let my children be themselves. I enjoy having all my ducks in a row, but the unpredictability of children's personalities continually throws me for a loop. So much of the time the new developments are so obviously positive, like walking, talking, learning letters, then starting to read words, or interacting with other kids and adults, going to school, playing soccer, telling jokes, etc. Yet some of the time the new developments aren't so obviously positive--I don't think that there are any developments at this young age that are obviously negative. The latter category throws me more than the former. At first I patiently play along. Then I get frustrated. Then I get worried. Then I give up. Usually at that moment I begin to see the positive aspects to the seemingly negative developments more clearly. Take my two-year old, for example. She is a very strong-willed little girl and displays that characteristic by ignoring virtually everything we say if she doesn't like it. Then she will pursue her own objectives no matter what the cost. Certainly it was cute at first, then frustrating (I still come back to this often), then worrisome (I'm over this), and just as I feel the desire to throw my hands in the air I realize, "Hey, I want my little girl to grow up knowing what she wants and standing up for it. I want her to be passionate, curious, and creative. I want her to be unafraid to slug a boy who isn't treating her right." Although we do discipline her when any passion (screaming) or slugging is directed our way or her curiosity and creativity comes at the cost of injury to persons or property, we do not want to quash her insatiable spirit. We are still looking for ways to channel it, and when we do, I have a feeling she will not only be good but exceptional.